Guest Writer: "Rocket the Camel" Checks In

EDITOR'SNOTE: After leaving Marrakech, Anne and Mark headed to the sand dunes known as or located at Erg Chebbi (never quite figured out if that was the name of the dunes or of the location).  There, they stayed a night at a hotel, then went on a trek on camelback into the dunes for an overnight in a tent, Beduin style.  This blog entry was submitted by "Rocket," the unhappiest camel in Africa.  The reasons he is so unhappy.... well, let's just let Rocket tell his own story.

Does it look like the camels are posing for the camera?

Hello, I am Rocket the camel.  That's me in the photo above with the red circle around my head (I don't remember seeing that when the picture was taken - weird...).  I know it might seem strange to the uninitiated, that a camel who really never moves much faster than a brisk walk would be named "Rocket."  It sounds like a misnomer, like calling that guy busting my hump (literally) "Handsome."  Well let me tell you, I got wheels.  I can run like the wind, ladies and gentlemen.  The problem holding me back is that I have been labeled a second tier camel.  The camel in front of me, Rudolf (yep, just like the reindeer, and yes, I have heard the song), is slow, so I have to go as slow as him.  Otherwise, though, I would be outrunning the wind.

But slow walking isn't so bad.  In fact, once you get used to the view (and unless you are a lead camel, the view ain't great, so this takes some effort), life here on the dunes isn't so bad.  In the mornings, me, Rudolf and the boys kind of wander around looking for something to eat.  It's pretty much free range.  Then, at about 3 pm (just kidding - I have no idea what time it is, I just know it is a bit after the sun reaches its zenith - didn't think I would be unable to deal with the concept of measuring time, but still be able to properly use "zenith" in a sentence, did you?), me and the boys head back to the stables to be suited up for work.

Heading back to punch in for work.

Sometimes people are surprised to learn that there is no bell or anything, we just show up on time for work everyday.  Those people are playing into the "lazy camel" stereotype, which is not true.  The one about spitting - that one's true, but not the one about being lazy.  Or the one about being slow.

Left to right: Anne, Rudolf, Edi

And most of the time, work isn't too bad, either.  Edi, the Beduin guy in the blue pictured above, hooks us up with grain and water, so that's pretty sweet.  And he keeps the jackals away, which is a big plus.  I hates me some jackals.  Then he puts blankets around our humps every afternoon, which is nice.  Then we go pick up some out-of-towners and wander into the dunes, sleep the night, then come back.  And as long as the tourists are cool (like the lady riding Rudolf shown above), we have no problems and it ain't such a bad gig (sure beats racking up billable hours).

But just like everybody else, sometimes we have a bad day at work.  Let me tell you about this one day.  So we're all sitting outside the Yaz (Editor's note: Rocket is referring to the Yasmina Hotel, where Anne and Mark stayed on their first night in the dunes).  Then this lady comes out with 4 dudes.  The lady gets on Rudolf and it turns out the four dudes is actually just one guy.  (It's an honest mistake though - see for yourself - he is the guy blocking half of the horizon in the photo at the top of this post.  I mean, come on, who blocks out the HORIZON?)  So then I say to the guys, "YHHHHHHHH!!" - which is camel for "Holy crap, buddy, take it easy on the Krispy Kreme!"  The guys remained perfectly silent and motionless, showing their approval.  Then I thought to myself that I sure felt sorry for whoever had to lug this monster around.

Then wouldn't you know it, he came right over to me.  COMEON!

Then it got worse.  Once Jabba the Tourist hopped on, it appeared he had never ridden a camel before.  Here's a tip: two hands on the wheel, hot shot.  (Editor's note: camels making Star Wars references are surprisingly common in Morocco, most likely because the scenes on Tattoine were actually shot in Morocco).

So talk about your bad days: not only do I not get to show off my speed, I have to lug this guy who may or may not try to eat me.  Ugh.  Makes me want to spit.

But it wasn't all bad.  The nice lady gave me a bit of attention, which actually worked out well for her because I was probably going to spit on her right before this, but called off the salivary attack when she showed a little love.

The camel whisperer.

Well, anyway, once I got properly burdened with way too much humanity, we took off for the dunes.  It was a pretty slow pace.  Again, this is not my fault, when you're strapped to the camel in front of you, it's  difficult to change speeds.

In your face, Lawrence of Arabia

Then we made it to the camp and Bob's Big Boy hopped off, leaving Rudolf and me be for the night.  In the morning, I knew it was going to be "back to the Yaz," so I decided to get some sleep to re-charge my batteries.  But first, I made sure to watch the famous Moroccan sunset.