...And We're Back!

As avid readers of this blog may have noticed, there has not been a posting in quite some time.  The reason for this absence is that Anne and Mark left Blagoevgrad immediately after the end of the spring semester and did a 15 day trip through Spain and Italy.  For the majority of the journey, Anne and Mark were joined by their niece, who we will refer to as "Bren."  Bren has recently completed her first year of undergraduate studies and journeyed across the Atlantic in search of culture, adventure and comedy jokes.  Anne and Mark were called upon to provide all three.  Bren's trip was a mad dash across five cities, jammed-packed with enough culture to choke a horse.

But a trip to Europe with Anne and Mark is not just about museums and old churches.  Bren's first trip to the continent had it all: overnight train rides, seeing people with awesome hair in surprising places, increasingly ridiculous hats, surprisingly aggressive yelling directed at flower salesmen, Mark running into elderly men in tour groups and, yes, a big-time celebrity siting.  Who could ask for more?

Let's start with the hats.

Apparently, the requirement for military and/or security-related headgear in Europe is that it be either (a) pretty silly looking or (b) exist as a symbol of the uselessness of the person who is wearing said headgear or (c) both.  The "guards" above are wearing headgear that appears to have been made out of formed plastic.  The front, top and sides of it appear to be a black, plastic cereal bowl.  This is, of course, totally without any type of use, but essentially unremarkable.  The rubber really meets the road on these sombreros with that back piece.  A flat piece on the back of the hat.  What purpose could that possibly serve?  To protect the top of the skull from attack from the rear?  Possibly.  Some type of mechanism to allow these hats to be stacked more easily?  Possible, but unlikely.  According to legend, the actual purpose of the flat back of the hats on these jokers is to allow them to lean against the building and have a smoke without the tourists noticing that they are slacking off.  That's going through a lot of work to be a little bit lazy.

This plaza has had more than one name over the years.  It is currently called "El Plaza Mayor."  The English translation of this is "The Plaza Mayor."

Both the photo of the "guards" and the photo immediately above are from Madrid.  Madrid is the capital city of Spain and was the site of quite a lot of violence historically.  For example, the square pictured above, which currently hosts Anne and Bren (not facing the camera) and a fairly extensive variety of street performers (to be discussed in a future post), hosted executions during the height of the Spanish Inquisition.  Apparently, anyone who was not Christian, or more accurately stated, anyone who was not "Christian enough," was subject to a serious of punishments up to and including death.  If a poor soul was sentenced to death for a conversion to Christianity that was not convincing enough to the local authorities, such poor soul may have been put to death in this square.  The balconies in the photo above - visible over the street performer wearing the Mickey Mouse with the stars and stripes outfit - were rented out by the wealthy residents of Madrid who found this to be quality entertainment (the execution, not the stars and stripes Mickey).

In addition to this square, there are numerous other locations throughout Madrid which mark places where important killings took place.  From time to time Anne, Mark and Bren wondered what victims had done to incur the punishments they had received.

Flamenco dancers beheaded and left on the city street.

But even with this combination of memorials, guards and headless dancers, it was clear that not every rule imposed in this city was going to be followed.  Some brave men and women had brazenly broken rules and inspired future generations to do the same.  For example, the city had a clear rule against giving a "thumb's up."

Not right on.

Anne, Mark and Bren found this sign over and over again (mostly on the subway).  The city was clearly stating that they did not want the people to encourage one another, as this could lead to an uprising.  However, Anne, Mark and Bren found at least one brave woman who was willing to ignore this dictate and give the thumb's up for all to see:

Right on, sister!!!

Inspired by this rebellion, Anne, Mark and Bren marched over to the Royal Palace.  Ostensibly, they were there as tourists, but who would be surprised if they broke a few rules once they got there???

The Palacio Real de Madrid is the official home of the royal family of Spain (which is composed, most probably, of Rafael Nadal and Penelope Cruz, as they are the most famous Spanish people).  However, the royal family does not actually live in this palace, so you can go on tours of the palace grounds.  

No photos are allowed inside the palace.  This rule is put into place either to protect the sensitive works of art and other artifacts from the harsh and potentially harmful "click" sounds made by cameras or to maximize the sales of postcards at the palace gift shop.  Obviously, under either justification, it is an important rule.  The importance of the rule was made even more evident by the fact that it was enforced by a "guard" with a particularly foolish-looking hat - one that ensured that he could serve no purpose whatsoever other than being the guy whose job it was to wear that hat.  And, with such an important rule, the consequences of breaking it must be severe.  Arrest?  Deportation?  Inquisition?

However, inspired by the courage of the thumbs-up lady in the painting, Mark went against all the rules and snapped a photo (*editor's note: a cynic might point out that Mark was simply not paying attention to the 'no photos' signs when he took the photo).  Was it worth the risk?  You be the judge:

Total contraband